Aristotle believes in the importance of friendship and that living well can only truly be achieved by people who have friends — “Without friends, no one would choose to live, even if he had all other goods…” I have never considered my friendships to be in the categories Aristotle has proposed; I’ve thought more I have best friends, friends, and acquaintances. After reading Aristotle’s proposition on the three different types of friendship, I agree with him.
He states there are three types of friendships: ones of pleasure, of utility, and in virtue. A friendship of utility is beneficial rather than just useful — they do not love each other for themselves, but rather the the good they get from each other. An example would be the barista at the coffee shop or the clerk at the grocery store. Once the interaction is over, the friendship of utility ends.
The second type of friendship is friendship of pleasure, which ends when the pleasure is no longer there. They love for the pleasure they get from each other, like friends who you only party with. Aristotle compares utility friendships and pleasure friendships by saying “… those who love for the sake of utility do so for the sake of what is good for themselves, and those who love for the sake of pleasure do so for the sake of what is pleasant to themselves”, and only for as long as they are useful or pleasant.
Friendships in virtue have a shared commitment to the good. These friendships are between people of similar virtue who bear goodwill to each other and who are wishing well to each other. True friendship to Aristotle is useful and pleasurable, but it is not its only purpose. Good friends seek the good for their friends.
After reading this, I could identify people in my life who fall into all categories. I definitely have friends based on utility: the guy at the car shop, my waitress, the cashier. My pleasurable friendships are people who I enjoy being around but don’t really have much love for them outside of the environment we are in. When I think of pleasurable friendships, I think of my coworkers and the friends that I only party with. My complete, virtuous friendships are with those I am closest too. We motivate each other to be better continuously in many aspects of life, but we can also enjoy the pleasures we get from hanging out together. I agree with Aristotle that friendship is an important aspect to a fulfilling life. And I do agree with his three types of friendships, but I do want to note that just because someone isn’t a complete friend to you doesn’t mean you can’t seek the good for them or want well for them, it’s just unlikely you will be there to support them.
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